Hi Aunty I am Siara from Tsing yi , I want to know that Do You Think it is ok to tell white lies in Relationship? Why or Why not? Dear Siara, Even though these lies are small, but they do matter in relationship. White lies are not a totally good thing: the person being lied to is deprived of information that they might find useful even if they found it unpleasant. the person telling the lies may find it easier to lie in future and they may come to muddle the boundary between white lies and more blameworthy lies. In my opinion, lie is a lie, be sensitive to your partners feelings. As young kids telling white lies, we believed it is ok, never considered the consequence. ‘One lie ruins a thousand truths.
Hello Miss Mehta , I am Kshitij age 49, my wife Kirti 47 we have adopted a girl child 15 years back and after that my wife kirti got conceived and we became a parent of boy baby, now my both baby come to know the reality so they both don’t get easy going with each other, we are missing the family bond. What Can be suggestion from your side? Dear Kshitij Congratulation on parenthood! If you are raising biological and adopted children in your home, you may wonder how to meet each child’s unique needs while making them all feel equally loved and welcome in your family. In general, raising children is very challenging especially in today’s time. I am not sure how your children learnt about the reality. It must be very difficult on them both. Nevertheless, it is not too late, you and your wife both can make a light conversation with each one separately. Get to know her feelings, listen attentively, make mental notes of her response. Follow the similar pattern. In due time sit them together and share your feelings. Give them detailed information of your decision of adopting a child.
Hi Ma’am I am Shweta my age is 35, I am a house wife, I feel very nervous with people statement and it imbalance my emotional health, that’s why I disconnect myself from the people and feel like to alone. I overthink what he says and she says, that’s affect me a lot how to overcome? Dear Shweta, You may feel disturbed by others’ statements or perceptions and isolate yourself from others for several reasons that you may be aware of. Possibly, you have some knowledge or experiences that have led to your current situation. Pay attention to what makes you feel good about yourself, and you are more likely to be appreciated by others of your positive qualities. In order to gain a better understanding of yourself, it would be beneficial for you to consult a professional who can assess you and provide guidance. If you prefer you are welcome contact me.
Hi Aunty , I am Kayan from Tung Chung, I am 28 and still single. I only want to love my future wife so I didn’t try for any relationships. Is it bad because all my friends have girlfriends? Sometimes I also feel like having one. What should I do? Dear Kayan, Please don’t be intimated by the pressure of your peers. Although, these days it is very common to have a livein relationship. On the other hand, it is up to the individual, major disadvantage of live-in relationships is the lack of commitment that one or more partners in a relationship can begin to develop, quarreling, bickering, and uneasiness are all a part of living together with your partner. For some, more time spent together means a stronger bond. Live-in partners have enough time to get to know each other well and make an informed decision about getting married or breaking up without any additional expectations. You can discover how your other half lives, their habits, expectations and quirks. Yet for some, a good marriage is one which allows for change and growth in the individuals and in the way, they express their love. Marriage is a sacred institute where the couple learn to discover each other’s likes and dislikes and make adjustments as well as understand and respect and build their relation on those basis. Please, ‘Look before you leap.’
Hello Poonam Aunty, I am Shreya my age is 26, I don’t feel empathy for people, I’m an excellent liar, but I love and care for my boyfriend very much. I tend to be manipulative and impulsive as well. Does that mean I’m just a jerk or might I still be a sociopath, and can I love? Dear Shreya, You have defined yourself perfectly well, you seem to disregard your boyfriend’s feelings and yet feel capable of love! Ans : People in love need to understand true love, both partners recognize and value each other’s individuality, opinions, and feelings. Respect in true love means treating each other with kindness and honor, even in disagreements and enjoying healthy relationship. In my opinion your boyfriend does not deserve a sociopath partner. Please be honest to yourself, change before it is too late.
Hi Mehta Aunty, My Name is Akash from Sai Kung Is it true that if your girlfriend cheats on you once, she is going to cheat on you again? My ex-girlfriend cheated once and I forgave her, then she cheated a year and a half later and I forgave her again. Won’t she cheat again? Do we have future? Dear Akash, Your relationship with your girlfriend, seems very fictious and does not sound healthy. Possibly this pattern may continue . She sounds venerable and perhaps sociopath. ‘Good riddance of bad rubbish.’ Earlier the better.
Hi Mehta ji, I am a Common Guardian of two adult child from TST, staying in Hong Kong, I want you to please focus some points for this Generation kids how parents should guide them for future and career along with no money wasting Concepts.Dear Guardian, Being a single parent it requires a lot of patience combined with love and understanding as well as and positive parenting skills, they will do well when they have nurturing, warm, sensitive, responsive and flexible parent. Strong relationships with children are built on positive attention, quality time and interest. Clear rules and limits encourage positive behavior that help children feel secure. Share your concern with friends or immediate family members. Always be available.
If you ever need any advice come to Aunty for help. Please send us your questions by email to adesiflava@gmail.com with subject line : Aunty MVP In Love, Light & Healing
Article by:
Poonam V Mehta President (M. Ed. Guidance & Counselling) Educator & Counsellor Be the Change HK Ltd Reg: under section 88 MOB: 9235-6628 www.bethechangehk.org
